Monday, September 14, 2009

Part 25 - Light Bulbs Really Can Describe Your Religion:

How Many Seventh-day Adventist Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?
It Takes SIX: One to hold a silent prayer vigil, one to hold the ladder, one to change the bulb,  one to quote the appropriate scripture from the bible, and two to go knock on someone's door and annoy them.

Friday, September 4, 2009

Part 24 - Light Bulbs Really Can Describe Your Religion:

How Many N.O.M.A.A.M. Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?
All of them because beer makes you do stupid things.
Al Bundy's National Organization of Men Against Amazonian Masterhood, and church of Beer for men only.

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Part 23 - Light Bulbs Really Can Describe Your Religion:

How Many Taoists Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?
None: They think it is person who came back (reincarnated), and then left again to be part of the cosmos.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Part 22 - Light Bulbs Really Can Describe Your Religion:

How Many Confucius Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?
It Takes Two: One to change the light bulb, and one to write down words of wisdom for future bulb changers.

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Part 21 - Light Bulbs Really Can Describe Your Religion:

How Many Sikhs Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?
It Takes 2: One to change the bulb, and One to hold his turbine.

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Part 20 - Light Bulbs Really Can Describe Your Religion:

How Many Eastern Orthodox Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?
It Takes 3: One Bishop to approve the Light Bulb Change, One Apostle to hold the ladder, and One Apostle to change the bulb.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Part 19 - Light Bulbs Really Can Describe Your Religion:

How Many Charismatics Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?
Only One: Hands are already in the air.

Saturday, May 16, 2009

Part 18 - Light Bulbs Really Can Describe Your Religion:

How Many Catholics Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?
One: A Catholic Priest because they now use electric candles.

Saturday, May 9, 2009

Part 17 - Light Bulbs Really Can Describe Your Religion:

How Many Presbyterians Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?
None: Lights will go on and off at predestined times.

Saturday, May 2, 2009

Part 16 - Light Bulbs Really Can Describe Your Religion:

How Many Scientology Followers Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?
Two Members: One to secretly video tape the change, and one member to assigned as a sacrifice, usually Tom Cruise.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Part 15 - Light Bulbs Really Can Describe Your Religion:

How Many Methodists Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?
Undetermined: Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Bring a bulb of your choice to the Sunday lighting service and a covered dish to pass.

Friday, April 24, 2009

Part 14 - Light Bulbs Really Can Describe Your Religion:

How Many Nazarenes Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?
It Takes 6: One woman to replace the bulb while five men review the church lighting policy.

Friday, April 17, 2009

Part 13 - Light Bulbs Really Can Describe Your Religion:

How Many Hinduism Worshippers Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?
None: They burn Cow Dung for light.

Friday, April 10, 2009

Part 12 - Light Bulbs Really Can Describe Your Religion:

How Many Shintoism Worshippers Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?
Five: Two to ring the bell; One to bow; One to light the Incense Stick; and One to pray the bulb wont go out again.

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Part 11 - Light Bulbs Really Can Describe Your Religion:

How Many Buddhist Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?
None, Buddhist don't use light bulbs they only use incense sticks and candles. They believe they are all ready enlightened!

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Part 10 - Light Bulbs Really Can Describe Your Religion:

How Many Episcopalians Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?
It Takes 3: One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks, and one to talk about how much better the old one was.

Friday, March 27, 2009

Part 9 - Light Bulbs Really Can Describe Your Religion:

How Many Muslims Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?
None: Islam uses Camel Dung to make fire stick, give light.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Part 8 - Light Bulbs Really Can Describe Your Religion:

How Many Pentecostals Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?
One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Part 7 - Light Bulbs Really Can Describe Your Religion:

How Many Unitarians Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?
They choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, you are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, 3-way, long-life, tinted, and energy efficient; all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.

Monday, March 16, 2009

Part 6 - Light Bulbs Really Can Describe Your Religion:

How Many Mormons Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?
It takes 5: One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Part 5 - Light Bulbs Really Can Describe Your Religion:

How Many Lutherans Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?
None: Lutherans don't believe in change.

Monday, March 9, 2009

Part 4 - Light Bulbs Really Can Describe Your Religion:

How Many Atheist Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?
None: Darkness is good, so say they all!

Saturday, February 28, 2009

Part 3 - Light Bulbs Really Can Describe Your Religion:

How Many Amish Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?
What's a light bulb?

Friday, February 27, 2009

Part 2 - Light Bulbs Really Can Describe Your Religion:

How Many Roman Catholics Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?
None
They use Candles only.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Part 1 - Light Bulbs Really Can Describe Your Religion:

How Many Baptists Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?
At least 15 -
One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad and fried chicken.

This Blog will help you find out what kind of Religious Light Bulb your are!

I will try and cover all the religions.
If I miss one please let me know.